Moving, from the Cat’s Perspective

Moving day quickly approaches..

My poor babies. Lucy, the rounded one, has remained oblivious, lounging around as we strip our cabinets and stack boxes next to her bed. As an all-day-long sleeper she has never cared much where she ends up, as long as there is a lap to drool on every night. Leo, however, knows something is going down. His eyes are surly, half-closed as we pack, and he has been slinking around the house, visibly perturbed. As the frisky outdoor kitty, he is attached to this house and its yard the way Lucy and her 12-pounds of doughy fluff is attached to the ottoman.

Lucy, Leo

Lucy, Leo

We don’t want to move.  Not only do I hate the whole process of moving, our house is kinda rad. Perched in a quirky neighborhood in a peaceful hippy town, it has a beautiful new kitchen and bathroom, a gigantic amount of storage, a large master bedroom, and hardwood floors. It’s the best place I’ve ever lived that I’ve paid for myself. For the price of my rent, I could own two small houses in a different state, but I got over that pain a while ago. The main drawback to our house is that it is far from the freeway, stores, the city and, most importantly, my new job.

The new place is nice, with a big yard, and I know we’ll come to love it. Leo, however, is probably deathly afraid of going back to an apartment building, to something like what my previous landlord dubbed the “cat ghetto.” I let him share his thoughts.

Leo, on thug life:

I know I’m street- I’ve earned the right to say that. Were you born on a fluffy blanket, surrounded by the warmth of a mom and siblings? No? Well neither was I. My first moments of life were on hard, cold concrete. Our birth mom jumped away and never came back that first night, and we would have died if it weren’t for this human lady. She smelled funny but she was warm.

The humans have been good to us, I’ll admit, though I’m not sure if anyone could resist my sexiness; I look damn fine. But the digs have been rough. All I want is a little peace when I go out, a field where I can stalk gophers and birds, but instead I keep running up on these fools. I’ll find the perfect hunting spot and “boom!” some psycho ginger is all over me like a hungry flea. At the last place, I perfected my battle skills: fast paws, sinking butt bites, ominous growls and even rooftop ambushes. I also kept getting stuffed into this crappy plastic crate and going to this cold little room where.. I’ll leave the rest to your imagination; Let’s say these weren’t my fondest memories.

At our place now, I run the street. A couple lady cats about half my size sometimes come in the yard, but they see my statuesque self, hear my now grizzled battle howl, and they flee. (Why don’t I make nice with the females? That ship sailed a loong time ago, sadly). Around here, I’m the Leo. All the humans know my name.

My humans aren’t fooling me- I know what the boxes mean. I guess I should start sharpening my claws, cause it could be back to the ghetto for us.

As long as my internet gets hooked up correctly, I’ll have the rest of the Hawaii trip next week!

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  1. Pat Hatt says:

    haha yeah they sure know when it is time to go
    Pat Hatt recently posted…A Darn It Comes Due A Time Or Two!My Profile

  2. kianwi says:

    Aw, poor Leo. It’s funny how they know when something’s up. But I love that Lucy is oblivious :) That picture of them is completely adorable!
    Good luck on the move! I hope Leo approves.
    kianwi recently posted…The NavigatressMy Profile

  3. Andrew says:

    Speaking of gophers, we had a nice offering in our driveway this morning.
    You say “peaceful hippy town,” and I think of Sebastopol.
    Andrew recently posted…How To Be…My Profile

    • winopants says:

      At one point, a roommate at an old apartment kept a tally of leo’s “offerings.”
      Sebastopol is not far off in terms of atmosphere

  4. Poor poor Leo… I’ve got two cats myself and whenever we’re packing our suitcases, they know somthing fishy’s going on. Congrats on the new job!
    the blue grumpster recently posted…An Eggcellent Grumpy Easter To You Too! (Easter Beavers Included)My Profile

  5. Leo’s got a lot of attitude for a tom that’s been deknackered. I’ve always wondered if anyone owns toms capable of impregnating females. Good luck with the move – I hope the new place wins your heart.
    Gorilla Bananas recently posted…Tiger’s latest birdieMy Profile

    • winopants says:

      Intact toms aren’t the friendliness cats in the world, I like that mine is nicely sissified; he’s a handful enough as it is.
      I have the instinct the new place will be fun :)

  6. For me, it’s all about the internet. I start making calls ahead of time to set up an appointment to have the internet hooked up as soon as I unlock the doors for the first time.

    I think I could live in a doghouse as long as I had high speed Wi-Fi.
    Brett Minor (@brettminor) recently posted…“A” is for AllergiesMy Profile

    • winopants says:

      Same with me, I was a little stressed until I got the internet scheduled. If I can’t check my email I get twitchy

  7. My cat always knows when something’s up. But she’s been on the streets. She used to be a “bolter”… because her previous owners were neglectful idiots. She actually got set on fire by some asshole kids (but she’s not permanently damaged, just a little scar on her back). Now that she’s here, though, she’s an institutionalized cat, and if she accidentally gets locked outside, she’s at the door within minutes, yeowling to be let back in.

    • winopants says:

      Oh no :( We used to have a cat like that, she liked to sit on the patio but as soon as you closed the door she’d be in a panic at the slider. She was a shelter cat, so she had some trust issues. My girl cat now is almost just as nutty, I’m not sure what her excuse is, since I raised her from day one (wait, hmmm…)

  8. Agh my heart goes out to you because I HATE MOVING. Kitties? They’re adaptable. Plus, they don’t have to life boxes and sneeze to death from years of accumulated dust.
    Your kitties are cute, BTW.
    Natalie the Singingfool recently posted…The Knots Taking OverMy Profile

  9. Cheryl P. says:

    Moving can be a real pain in the tushy but I hope you all settle in happily. I am sure Lucy and Leo realize that they will still have their people to care about them at the new place. Life is good.
    Cheryl P. recently posted…Happy EasterMy Profile

  10. Awww, thug cat is adorable. I’m sure he’ll get over it. I hope your new place comes to feel like home (for all of you) quickly!
    SarcasticNinja recently posted…Jesus: He’s Back – And This Time, He’s MadMy Profile

  11. EmmaK says:

    ooh I can’t help wishing I was Leo, life on the streets chasing lady cats and birds….licking my balls without anyone telling me that’s not on…..lovely!!

  12. Valerie says:

    Oh man… Moving does suck. I bet you’ll love the new place, as will the cats. Animals adjust quickly…. Or pee on things when stressed. One of those 2 things. I can’t remember the details.

    Much luck on your move!


    Valerie recently posted…A is for AwesomeMy Profile

  13. Some houses are sold on the strength of their distance away from the freeway. So solly you have to give it up. Hope the move goes well.

    In the meantime, here’s some cat haiku for you. I did NOT write these. I don’t know who did. I wish I did.

    The food in my bowl
    is old, and more to the point
    contains no tuna.

    Seeking solitude
    I am locked in the closet.
    For once I need you.

    Tiny can dumped in
    plastic bowl. Presentation
    one star; service none.

    Am I in your way?
    You seem to have it backwards.
    This pillow is taken.

    Your mouth is moving
    up and down emitting noise.
    I’ve lost interest.

    The dog wags his tail
    seeing approval. See mine?
    Different message.

    My brain walnut-sized.
    Yours largest among primates.
    Yet, who leaves for work?

    Toy mice, dancing yarn,
    meowing sounds. I’m convinced.
    You’re an idiot.
    The Unbearable Banishment recently posted…A horse is a horse, of course, of course.My Profile

  14. Scarlett says:

    Ugh, good luck with the move – I have to move too and it absolutely SUCKS x
    Scarlett recently posted…Facebook Mutants.My Profile

  15. Leslie says:

    I hate moving! But hopefully you, and Leo, will like the new place and find really cool things about it too! Funny how some animals sense something is up and get all weirded out and others are oblivious. Our dogs are the same. Happy Moving!
    Leslie recently posted…Pope WalterMy Profile

  16. Ericamos says:

    Thug Leo is awesome!! He’ll adjust just fine. Hope you’ll be able to adjust to your new home quickly as well.
    Ericamos recently posted…Say My NameMy Profile

  17. Our two cats would probably love a move. They’ve been indoor cats their whole lives and if you ask me they seem pretty bored all the time.
    Christian at Point Counter-Point Point Point recently posted…What Kind of Noodler Are You?My Profile

  18. Misty says:

    I, too, feel your pain of great house far from all. At this point, though, we are stuck with it, which means stuck with a ridiculously hellish commute. C’est la vie. Good luck with the move. Looking forward to Hawaii part deux!
    Misty recently posted…The Disney DiariesMy Profile

  19. Good luck with the move! And, oh my that picture is hilarious!
    Punky Coletta recently posted…I showed you mine, now you show me yours!My Profile

  20. MikeQ says:

    I started laughing with Leo’s words, “I know I’m street” … and didn’t stop lauging until the end. Really nice creative twist. Looking forward to spending more time here after the weekend. Great blog, Mandy! Best of luck with the new living quarters, and the new job.

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